Why We Rush (and How to Stop Passing Hustle Energy to Our Kids)
- Elizabeth A Burnham
- Oct 6
- 2 min read
The other morning my four-year-old took five whole minutes to get into her car seat. If you’re a parent, you know this can feel like forever. I asked her to get in at least twenty times while she showed me her toys, looked around the car, and moved at her own little pace. Meanwhile, I could feel my chest tightening, my thoughts racing, and that familiar stress creeping in.
This isn’t just about being late. It’s about what happens in our bodies when we feel the pressure to rush — and how that gets passed down to our children.
Why We Rush
Many of us were rushed as kids. Parents saying “hurry up or we’ll be late” was normal. Our nervous systems learned that urgency equals safety, so now as adults we rush through everything — even when it doesn’t really matter.
The problem is, living this way keeps us in a stress response. And then, without meaning to, we teach our children to live in that same constant state of hurry.
What Happens Somatically
When we feel rushed, our system often shifts into fight-or-flight. You might notice:
Tightness in your chest or shoulders
Shallow breathing
Racing thoughts or self-criticism (“I should have left earlier… I can’t be late again…”)
A sense of urgency even when nothing is truly at stake
That stress state carries into the rest of the day, creating tension in your body and nervous system.
How to Pause and Shift
The good news is, you can interrupt the cycle with a simple somatic practice. This isn’t about pretending your child magically gets into the car seat faster — it’s about regulating your system so you don’t pass the stress along.
Somatic Pause Practice
Feel your feet. Notice the contact your feet make with the ground. Imagine roots dropping into the earth.
Exhale slowly. Let out a long sigh, even with sound if it feels good. This signals safety to your body.
Expand your vision. Instead of laser-focusing on the car seat battle, soften your gaze and notice your surroundings. This opens your nervous system out of tunnel vision.
Name what’s true. You might silently say, “We are safe. We are just a few minutes behind. I can choose calm.”
This practice takes less than a minute and can be done in the car, at home, or anywhere.
Journal Prompt for Integration
Think back to a time you felt rushed as a child. How did it feel in your body? How do you notice that same pattern showing up in your mornings now? What would shift if you gave yourself and your child more permission to move at your own pace?
When we pause, breathe, and regulate our own systems, we break the cycle of hustle energy. We show our kids a different way of being — one rooted in calm, presence, and joy.
If you can relate to this post, I'd love to chat. I help women just like you move out of the hustle and into calm.
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